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A Little Bit Complainy, if I May
Dec. 16th, 2020 03:08 pmThis week has been A Lot. I mean, normal amounts of A Lot by 2020 standards, but still. A Lot.
It’s the last week before winter break, and we’ve had to go to distance learning due to covid cases within the school community. I absolutely appreciate how seriously our school takes safety measures. Compared to other QSI schools, we’ve been able to keep at least some portion of the school open all year. This week marks the first time elementary, middle, and secondary have all been closed (pre-school is in a separate building, which has helped them stay open all year so far), and it’s only for four days, which is great! Minsk continues to see high numbers of new cases in the city, despite the mask mandate (which many people do follow in public, as far as I’ve seen), so it’s not a surprise that school has gone online, but it is disappointing. And stressful. I tried to conduct a discussion of Mary Oliver’s poem “Wind River” and how it fits in with her other poems, all while construction goes on in the apartment above mine. Fun!
Along the lines of school, one of my kiddos plagiarized an assignment, and this is after the last period of distance learning, where plagiarism kind of ran rampant. When we returned to school, our principal held a school-wide meeting discussing plagiarism and its consequences, so it’s extra disappointing this kiddo chose to cheat. I was going to be a little soft-hearted about it, but my principal was like, “No. We had a big meeting, this kid is in high school, there is a set process for this sort of violation.” And I appreciate that. I appreciate the support of admin and their clear guidelines, and I also know this mistake isn’t going to define the kid’s whole schooling, if they don’t let it. It’s still not fun to deal with.
Speaking of letting people walk all over me, the sangcheng troll came back with a creepy vengeance. They poked through my twitter to find selfies I posted and used them to continue their nasty, transphobic comments. Like, I DO NOT understand this troll. I understand antis and purity culture and ship wars — I don’t condone them and I think people need to take a breather, but I do understand how people can build cultural things like characters into their identity, project onto them so much that when someone else innocently enjoys the thing in a way that runs contrary to that, a troll will lash out. I understand, too, that it isn’t right. What I cannot fathom is what makes a person take the leap to telling a writer or artist to kill themself, or to make disgusting outright personal attacks or to be a creepy stalker. I was content to report and delete comments until they made it so personal, and now I’ve decided to shut down all comments on my fics, and it makes me so sad, because I’ve had so many lovely interactions with people outside of this One Troll. I hate that their actions were able to get to me in this way, but also, I can’t defend against it. And I don’t actually blame AO3 on this. I do still want a block button because it’s faster than waiting for them to take action on an abuse report. This troll registers new accounts for the sole purpose of harassing writers. Maybe I’m naive, but I don’t know how AO3 can prevent that. And AO3 acted quickly, taking the account down within 24 hours of reporting (and plenty of other sangcheng writers reported it, too). Even with moderation on, limiting comments to registered users, the troll got through. And I’m too tired to pretend it didn’t hurt. I’m not giving up writing, though, so the troll can just choke on my fics.
I’m honestly dreading the holidays. I need a break from work, but work also kept me distracted. I firmly believe These Times will pass and I’ll get to travel freely, walk about cities freely, hang out in cafes, visit my family and all that. I firmly believe that we’ll survive and thrive. But there are definitely days where I cannot see even the faintest glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel and can only feel the faintest breeze that lets me know there is an opening somewhere.
So yeah.
Thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who checks in with me. You are all my lights.
It’s the last week before winter break, and we’ve had to go to distance learning due to covid cases within the school community. I absolutely appreciate how seriously our school takes safety measures. Compared to other QSI schools, we’ve been able to keep at least some portion of the school open all year. This week marks the first time elementary, middle, and secondary have all been closed (pre-school is in a separate building, which has helped them stay open all year so far), and it’s only for four days, which is great! Minsk continues to see high numbers of new cases in the city, despite the mask mandate (which many people do follow in public, as far as I’ve seen), so it’s not a surprise that school has gone online, but it is disappointing. And stressful. I tried to conduct a discussion of Mary Oliver’s poem “Wind River” and how it fits in with her other poems, all while construction goes on in the apartment above mine. Fun!
Along the lines of school, one of my kiddos plagiarized an assignment, and this is after the last period of distance learning, where plagiarism kind of ran rampant. When we returned to school, our principal held a school-wide meeting discussing plagiarism and its consequences, so it’s extra disappointing this kiddo chose to cheat. I was going to be a little soft-hearted about it, but my principal was like, “No. We had a big meeting, this kid is in high school, there is a set process for this sort of violation.” And I appreciate that. I appreciate the support of admin and their clear guidelines, and I also know this mistake isn’t going to define the kid’s whole schooling, if they don’t let it. It’s still not fun to deal with.
Speaking of letting people walk all over me, the sangcheng troll came back with a creepy vengeance. They poked through my twitter to find selfies I posted and used them to continue their nasty, transphobic comments. Like, I DO NOT understand this troll. I understand antis and purity culture and ship wars — I don’t condone them and I think people need to take a breather, but I do understand how people can build cultural things like characters into their identity, project onto them so much that when someone else innocently enjoys the thing in a way that runs contrary to that, a troll will lash out. I understand, too, that it isn’t right. What I cannot fathom is what makes a person take the leap to telling a writer or artist to kill themself, or to make disgusting outright personal attacks or to be a creepy stalker. I was content to report and delete comments until they made it so personal, and now I’ve decided to shut down all comments on my fics, and it makes me so sad, because I’ve had so many lovely interactions with people outside of this One Troll. I hate that their actions were able to get to me in this way, but also, I can’t defend against it. And I don’t actually blame AO3 on this. I do still want a block button because it’s faster than waiting for them to take action on an abuse report. This troll registers new accounts for the sole purpose of harassing writers. Maybe I’m naive, but I don’t know how AO3 can prevent that. And AO3 acted quickly, taking the account down within 24 hours of reporting (and plenty of other sangcheng writers reported it, too). Even with moderation on, limiting comments to registered users, the troll got through. And I’m too tired to pretend it didn’t hurt. I’m not giving up writing, though, so the troll can just choke on my fics.
I’m honestly dreading the holidays. I need a break from work, but work also kept me distracted. I firmly believe These Times will pass and I’ll get to travel freely, walk about cities freely, hang out in cafes, visit my family and all that. I firmly believe that we’ll survive and thrive. But there are definitely days where I cannot see even the faintest glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel and can only feel the faintest breeze that lets me know there is an opening somewhere.
So yeah.
Thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who checks in with me. You are all my lights.
